My Stay on Shutter Island…(lolo)… also known as My Life

A Course in Miracles is about undoing every single beLIEf that I hold dear. My ‘literal’ metaphor of this process, was to tear up and throw away my Doctor of Chiropractic license and diploma. In the horizontal world, it was a license to ‘fix the body’. And where I am at now, this will keep me stuck in the Matrix, the horizontal world, the delusion we call ‘life’.

Waking up from this delusional projection is not easy, or we would have all done it by now. Jesus showed us how to do this how many thousands of years ago?  Resurrection is WAKING UP. Yet talk to most anybody, about the story of Jesus and it will end with ‘his’ suffering and death.

I giggle as I think of all the religious icons of my youth depicting Jesus on the cross. All these idols screamed of suffering. I finally found a picture of a ‘laughing Jesus’. This is the image I hold in my Heart. This is the symbol I hold as Truth. I can only suffer as long as I am not getting the point. I Make all ‘suffering’ up.

OMG, the journey this Truth has taken me on. Most recently to La Casa de Milagros. It is an ACIM based Community that is Joined in Waking Up. I liken this community to the ‘Insane Asylum’ in the movie, “Shutter Island”. (A new Favorite Movie form David Hoffmeister’s “Movie Watcher’s guide to Enlightenment). The movie is a little dark for some… and then… my projection of this world has been a little dark. (giggling out loud here) The insane asylum is in my mind. And sorting out this delusional world has been a process. Now the movie “Shutter Island appears as a comedy’… This is the result of ‘changing my mind’ with Holy Spirit and seeing everything differently.  And this comes with me really owning I created all darkness… and the beauty of this process… and Jesus promised me this as stated in A Course in Miracles…

“And He would have all tears be wiped away, with none remaining yet unshed, and none but waiting their appointed time to fall. For God has willed that laughter should replace each one, and that His Son be free again.” —ACIM

I am so gratefull for my three month stint at La Casa de Milagros. A Course in Miracles community committed to waking from my vicious projection, called life. ACIM refers to it as the ‘horizontal world’… the world of lifetimes of being supposedly reborn again and again, a Ground Hog day of the most vicious mind games. I perpetrated these mind games on my self…lol…omg… what a ride this has been!

The reflections I see here in the horizontal are only here for me to see differently through Love. I Highly recommend a month long immersion at an acim community, to get a taste of the Clearing that is necessary. I stayed for three months, and now find myself in a hotel in Guadalajara, Mexico.

I left the Community when my desire to write with Holy Spirit drove me out. My writing takes place always at 2am… and continues for several hours. This hotel, right now is perfect for quiet time, I am Hearing Holy Spirit all day long. Writing a lot at all hours, praying even more!

I let very little outside stimuli to enter at this time. The idea of acim communities is to use function to focus the mind. We have no idea how scattered our thoughts are until we go to a place committed to eliminating outside distractions. Focus on ‘function’. Prayer and function. That appears to be the receipe for awakening.

unknownThe acim community environment occurred a bit like ‘Shutter Island’… A safe environment to let all of these insane ideas come up. Until we wash each of these hidden ideas clean in the Light of Love, they drive us and create havoc in our matrix, our dream. The diagnosis of cancer was dependant on believing a lot of crap. I appear to be shedding much of this now. (again giggling out loud)

The Truth… I am the only one that can persecute. I am hurting myself with any thoughts of bad terrorist, Hitler, cancer, or ‘fat’; as they are all in my mind and recreate themselves in horizontal time. If I judge any of them, I suffer and the delusion plays on.

And when I can Clear with God, with Love, these thoughts disappear into a puff of nothing. And I really get… that through my judgment of everything, I persist in ‘seeing’ persecutions. Seeing ‘cancer’ for example. And it is only in the acceptance of My Godliness… My Innocence… My sinlessness, Love, that I can correct this dream. AND this is revealed to my usually by my ‘judging you or the world’… So as I accept responsibility for every judgment, seeing my innocence, me need to judge anything in the dream is reduced.  There by the world seems to be a happier and happier place.

So as I accept my innocence, my sinlessness, my Godliness, I stop projecting and judging ‘you’… lolol… Blessed Be lololol

images-1My resistance to accepting this unconditionally is what will ‘set me free’… and with this… ‘I set all free’… and that is what acim is all about. As One Heals, We All are Healed.

So the dramatic scenes played out on Shutter Island are for ‘me’ only. For ‘me’ to return to Love. If I am willing to see everything differently… through Love… forgiving myself for dreaming up ‘hitlers’, ‘terrorists’, ‘cancer’ and ‘fat’… I can move past this dream of horror.

As an example of the Clearings going on for me… I am allowing the deeply held beLIEfs to surface around ‘cancer’. During one expression session I accessed a ‘desire’, “I would rather die thin than live fat”… well imagine my surprise. Why am I so terribly frightened of ‘fat’… and the Clearing process is allowing me to see where this beLIEf started and then it unravels very quickly. I take all of the resultant thought and ask Holy Spirit to see them through the eyes of God, through Love, accepting the atonement for ‘my small judgmental’ thoughts.

There is a form (process) available to be downloaded from on line, “the Instrument for Peace”. This is a worksheet ( ) put out by the Living Miracles organization that actually takes you through a clearing in undoing beLIEfs. Like my BeLIEf I had cancer… omg, what this brought up!

I must have done 50 Instruments for Peace in the first two months!… And the clearing actually occurred quite readily once I had the willingness to see it differently!

All of our stories are different yet the resistance to see how we think is the same. And only after I admit what I  see as the truth in the horizontal world, (ex. ‘I have cancer’) and ask to See through Holy Spirit’s eyes (God did not creat cancer ‘I did’), then I get to see my judgements, forgive myself for having them and return to my innocence.

This is called Living A Course in Miracles! (this is not ‘book study’…lolol…those days are over!)

Now many are probably judging me at this moment thinking, Thinking, ‘You’re nuts’… and I would answer unequivocably, ‘Yes!’ And am so grateful to be seeing ‘my insanity’ With the Holy Spirit and the Love of God. For crazy is but a judgment that begs my forgiveness!

This is what living in an ACIM community is all about. Allowing ‘resistance’ to come up with Mightie Companions that may or may not judge… but these companions have something different from the horizontal world… They are willing to See all ‘judgmental thoughts’ differently. So what may start out as a judgment, results in a forgiveness opportunity… to release the judgment and return to Love, for All of Us!

unknown-1All of the ‘actors’ in community, playing out whatever ‘hell’ in their minds… bumping into other stories, returning to sanity by being a commitment to share our insanity and accept the atonement. To be willing to change our minds. Those are the Miracles.

So for now, my Healing continues as I persist in seeing the common thread in all my nightmares… me. And with this acceptance… Peace… the Peace of God that I have wanted for lifetimes, returns.

Blessed Be….