The ‘Last’ Yard Sale

Yard sales have always been a part of ‘my life’… each time the ‘space’ I inhabit becomes to cluttered or when I change residences… I have a ‘yard sale’…

So the ‘Last’ Yard Sale preceded my trip to live in La Casa de Milagros in Chapala, Mexico… the ‘Last’ of a lifetime of yard sales. Time to set all ‘symbols free’.

I have become aware of how I ‘hide’ behind stuff… all just ‘symbols’… all ‘desires’ at one time… all usually ‘complete’ when ‘I decide to sell’.. This yard sale was slightly different… I have been ‘coached’ by God… Seeing All things as ‘symbols of Love in some way… but not the Love that is talked about in A Course in Miracles… the small minded love of ‘desire’. Not the Eternal Love of God.

So this yard sale was set in motion… All was to Go… and as I walked around my house unknownorganizing… I would come across a ‘special’, ‘shiny sparkly’ item… and my ‘mind would think’…. “Oh… I Love that ‘shiny sparkly thing’… perhaps I could keep just this one ‘special item’… And God would Jump right in…

“Would you be willing to ‘give this up…. Say… for…. Eternal Salvation?”… and in the moment that I would open my mouth to resist…I would ‘Crack up’ and place the item in the Pile… the pile of All the symbols of a ‘life well lived’. God has a way of getting ‘my Attention’…AND… I was moving in a different direction… my True Nature… Holding only the Love of God… Trusting All Needs will be provided for by God as I just say no to ‘all shiny sparkly items’, that only serve to keep me ‘desiring more’.

So the day of the yard sale came… Lars came and Showed Up in a Big Way as Always… I so Adore his Friendship. We moved everything out into the parking lot in the front of the building…. During the foreclosure, I gave away Much. All the hobbies, stained glass, gardening, horse paraphernalia, library, clothing, furniture, kitchen appliances… all left to find new Homes… so this last yard sale was the last of the really ‘Special things’…All theimages nick knacks, paintings, jewelry, books, clothing, and ‘special furniture’… all to go… I feel as if this is just tidying up… the foreclosure started this process for me, and this yard sale will complete ‘my life with miscellaneous stuff’ (the stuff that defined me and my past)…

As folks rummaged through my life as ‘stuff’…. They would call out and ask… “How much for this?”

Very soon I became aware of something… the price did not matter… I was responding with a buck… two bucks… and if I felt it was really, really special… FIVE bucks…lolo

What was more important was to ‘tell the story’… each of the last of the special items came with a story… and I felt Compelled to Share that… so before I received the bills they were waving around… I shared… “That mirror was made from wood torn off of a building while I lived in Jerome, Arizona in the 70’s”… or “that is the last painting my Mother ever did”… all just symbols from ‘my past’… not really worth much… just a ‘special something’… looking for a new person to ‘desire’ it.

Now here is the interesting connection… while in Hospice… my whole focus was to Clear out all ‘past stuff’… thoughts, ideas, goodbyes to friends and critters… the Clearing was making ready ‘to die’.

Now since I Am Moving into Life again… my old inclination was to ‘re new’ these old ideas, friendships and animal loves… building a future on past symbols… but all of these ideas and friends were Not Working as they once appeared to… animals were getting older and dying… ‘friends’ could not get by the fact that ‘I had cancer’… ideas from the past produced no real Happiness for me… such as re-establishing a chiropractic practice… gardening, cooking, dinner with friends… I was Not dying… and I certainly was not Living… more like a purgatory… lacking Joy and passion.

Even the guy that lives in the front half of the condo honestly shared with me one day… “I felt you were waiting to die still”… ouch…lololol… and He was Totally RIGHT!

So this yard sale was like emptying the past life and death out of my surroundings… Becoming an empty vessel for a future… yet there was some inherent problems with this picture… ‘futures’ are always based on a ‘past’ (ego is always about contrasts…good/bad, right/wrong, past/future)… and with no past… where was the future?…

Now this is where acim became very Helpful… God is ONLY Present in the NOW. So the yard sale was a Commitment to Release all symbols from a past… that did die… and really needed to be released…

The move to the Monastery was the Possibility for a Joyous Life based on Nothing I have Ever Known.

The Monastery is ALL about staying in the present moment… so going to it… provided me with a Blank canvas… One that would be created One brush stroke at a time… based on Love… not need or desire… and this is a whole new Life… in the present moment and focused on Happy… wow… the only thing that I could sideswipe myself with was ‘fearing the unknown future’… and as you will see… if you are a ‘follower’…lol… the silent retreat would be very usefull…

And for Now… Know that No ‘shiny special things’ were harmed in any way during the projection of this story… and Much More is to be revealed… Have a Fabulous Moment of Now… xox

 

 

 

 

 

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